The Politically Incorrect Guide to Getting Away With Video Games While Married
Any married man who was born in the 1980's or after probably knows exactly what this article's headline is referring to.
Playing video games when you have a spouse - usually, a man's wife - can be downright difficult.
You want to pay attention to your job, to your house, and of course, to your spouse, but you also occasionally want to wind down, relax, and play some dumb video games.
If you're a married man and you've ever tried to get away with a Saturday of playing video games, then this article is for you. Why? Because you know the consequences of trying to play video games while having a spouse without doing it properly. Your wife can quite easily (and many times, justifiably) come down hard on you for playing games when, as an adult man, you should be doing more valuable things with her time.
But you still want to play video games, and you recognize that playing them doesn't make you a bad person. So if you want to get away with a little fun, here are some tips you may want to keep in mind for the future.
Note: For best results, the following advice is best taken with a grain of salt.
Set clear boundaries
If you're not yet married but plan on becoming so, you'll want to start as early as possible. You married men can't go back and change your relationship's boundaries from scratch. You can only start where you are. That's why it's important to set these boundaries early on. If your have a girlfriend who frequently complains about how much you play video games, let her know that it's a hobby that you enjoy, it's a socially acceptable behavior, and that you're not going to drastically reduce the amount of time you play video games. It's that simple. Many people in relationships that are still developing are looking to find these boundaries anyway - for many men, it might simply be your fault for allowing your girlfriend, fiancee or wife to intrude on your boundaries without you telling her where they are.
Logic is not your best weapon
No matter how logical you think it is to play video games, and no matter how good your argument for doing so is, trust me: it's not going to cut it. So don't play that game, because you can't win it. When you play video games, you're used to approaching them with logical problem-solving skills and strategy. When it comes to a relationship, you need to realize that you're dealing with an entirely different gender, and she doesn't play by video game rules.
If your wife complains about how often you play video games, don't try to argue about the merits of playing video games. Instead, realize that her complaints may be the symptom of some deeper need that is going unmet: she may simply wish that you could spend more time with her when you're relaxing.
Resting your wife's complaints gives her footing; don't let an argument erupt over a game of Madden on Xbox Live. Instead, realize that you can cut out many arguments before they happen by not necessarily looking to pick a fight. Even if your wife enters the room and starts a complaint, it's up to you to diffuse it. Your game has a pause button for a reason. Pay attention to her and try to understand where she's coming from. The more you argue with her over a silly video game, the worse off you'll be, and the worse you'll feel about playing the game.
In short, it's best to keep your relationship issues separate from your play. Don't make the mistake of believing your wife doesn't want you to play video games. Understand what it is about your habits that might be bothering her.
You need more answers? What am I, a psychologist? See an expert!
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